This is What I Do !

                                                                          I know I have been very bold in not saying anything in the last few days , and to be honest I really didn't have that much to say anyway . Now that's not at all like me , I mean even if I can't get my head together , I will always throw something out there . And sometimes I can be very insular , in that nothing or nobody can make me want to open my mind , for the need of a better explanation .
                                                                         I can be downright stubborn when it comes to sharing my thoughts and concerns . Never arrogant , I dislike anything that smells of arrogance . I dislike the need for having to explain myself though . Its not as if anything that I have done warrants an explanation about how , why or when . Trying to keep a handle on things is hard enough without having to feebly give directions as to why you did something in that particular manner . Or seemingly having to write an essay on the reasons why you feel a particular way .
                                                                        You see people like to put pressure on others to try and make them turn toward their predictable automated line of thinking
. They try and coerce you into thinking that you are in some way responsible for every little woe that takes place in their lives . Have you ever known someone like that ? Have you ever had to endure their constant inability to take responsibility for their own emotions ? You know the way it goes . Oh I don't know what I'd do without your input and your advice , I really need to get a hold of myself . And it goes on and on and on .
                                                                        I am in an unsympathetic mood . Maybe that's why I haven't written over the last few days ? You see when I begin these bloody blogs , I really don't know where they are gonna take me . I don't know what mood the blog is going to force on me . I just find it impossible to not get caught up in my own writing . It's not so easy being me , as you have obviously worked out by now . Its not so easy wanting everything and everybody to be ok and even a tiny bit happy . Though changing this course I am on , could never help me deal with all of the missions I want to fulfill . I have so much I want to say . I have so much inside my head that's bursting to come out . Eventually I know this bloody feeling will pass , but while it's here it tends to take my mind off the things that I feel that matter more importantly .
                                                                      Don't be alarmed by my insularity . I'm not . Don't try and fathom something that is not there in this blog . Don't try and translate this blog into something that it isn't . Just know that my brain is working properly , and normal service will resume as soon as possible .
                                                                      I am going to apologise in advance about the absolute distorted vein in which this blog was written . These are my thoughts . This is what I do . You have every reason to call this blog the greatest load of horse shit you have ever read . But then , you have every reason to call this blog very enlightening too . Your Choice !
No need to examine or analyze me , I am Well Beyond That !

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