Melting Lumps of Ice !

                                                           You just know everything has been done that was needed to be done , and yet its never enough . You've dotted all the i's and crossed all the t's and you still feel that something is just not right . So you re-examine all of your actions and deeds over a long period and you try and make sense of it all , or try to see if there is a pattern to all that has gone before . There are some things you know you could have improved upon , and yet there you sit wondering where it all went wrong .
                                                           Most times you can just point your finger and accuse , or the problem was so patently obvious that you just couldn't ignore it , but ignore it you did . You may not agree with the assessment , but that really doesn't matter anymore , all that matters is the here and now . The here and now is something that is frightening you , the past is exactly that the past . And the future is even more scarier than the present because at le
ast you have some hold over the present , but the future , now that's a whole different story .
                                                           You can lie to yourself about most things , but you can never lie to your emotions . You can never lie to your feeling of emptiness when that is the way that you feel . You can pretend a lot , but at some stage pretence only makes the path to reality longer than it has to be . If you're going to ignore the bare facts that are in front of you, you do yourself a disservice . You are tormenting yourself with endless possibilities that only flourish in your head . In the final analysis those possibilities are like melting lumps of ice you cling on to , in the hope that they wont melt . But you know they will , and again you are in a position of not being able to alter the simple fact of truth .
                                                          No matter how you tell your story , or even who you tell it to , the truth is always the truth . You can have your interpretation of it , and someone else can have theirs , but the one true denominator in both stories should always be the truth .
                                                          I am  writing these words for no other reason than to call attention to one's own honesty , and how that can be portrayed . If you have always been an honest person , where does the necessity arise from , to either alter your honesty , or when you become economical with the truth . Why do this ? What good does it do ? Why would you want other peoples perception of you to change ? We are all so transparent , we look at each other every day , so never create a picture of yourself that continuously needs altering .