A Bastard of a Bug !

My Name is BASTARD !
                                                                      For the last two weeks , something quite strange and unnerving has been happening in our humble household . My wife and I have spoken seriously about this , and have been at our wits end trying to deal with this problem . You will be familiar with my episode two weeks ago when I had these couple of procedures ? Well ever since then , and on the day after these procedures were done , I was introduced to this ( And all I can call it without really losing the Head ) is a Fucking Bastard of a Bug .
                                                                     He crawled up on me slowly , giving me a certain sense of foreboding for future days .He tickled my throat till insanity nearly kicked in . He rubbed my brow with a warm fluid just to keep my attention overflowing . While I was asleep he secretly and slyly kicked my ribs ,like some sort of thug you would like to decapitate . He silently blocked one of my ears leaving me with nothing but mono . Even my voice changed to suit his plans for me . I was so unwilling , but as we all know , this sort of unwelcome visitor will always win the argument with a lemon sip . You can try and keep the bastard down , but eventually your  weaknesses will be breached as you succumb to the demon Flu .
                                                                   At the moment they haven't given him a name as such . But from hearing from friends and neighbours , this has been one busy bastard of late . He is taking no prisoners , and it feels as if he is continually laughing at all of our human weaknesses . He really is one heartless bastard .
                                                                   You are probably wondering why I am getting so emotional and so angry about this . Well Its quite simple really . As you know these evil bug bastards have the ability and the capacity not just to target you . No they never do these things simultaneously . They impregnate you with the dose , and when you start to recover , your wife/husband will then enter the same realm of drudgery that you have been living in for two fu..... weeks .This bastard bug , won't hit you both at the same time , no , he will always deal you a double whammy . This is why I am angry . This is why I am taking it personal .
                                                                  My wife was given the bug by me . It was unintentional as you all know . Now because she has asthma , this bastard of a bug sent her to Accident & Emergency where she struggled to breathe for 5 Poxy hours waiting to be seen . Arriving at 3.30 pm , we were dispatched at 8.30 pm . Never one to complain about the resources available to hospitals , I will finish this piece just by saying God help anyone who is sick this winter . Its going to be a bastard !
                                                                 My wife is still not one hundred percent , but she is getting there very slowly . When opening your doors these winter evenings , be careful who you let in . These bastard bugs tend to come with a smile on their faces . Happy in the knowledge that yet again they have snared some poor unsuspecting victim .

      
No need to examine or analyze me , I am Well Beyond That !

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